Jul 16, 2012

The Everygirl Book Club: Wife 22 // week two

theeverygirl_bookclub

Hurray! It’s the second week of the Random House Reader’s Circle for The Everygirl! Now that we’re halfway done with Melanie Gideon’s Wife 22, we can finally discuss the latest Buckle family drama.

We’ve posted some questions below, but feel free to throw your own thoughts, questions, and opinions out there. And remember that our commenting programming allows you to reply directly to one another’s comments and get e-mail alerts when new comments are posted, allowing everyone to engage in conversation. That way, time zone and location is not a concern, and the conversation can continue all week!

*Please note: if you read ahead, be sure not to address anything that happens after page 195 (Chapter 60). We are so happy many of you already finished the book, but we don’t want to spoil anything!

Discussion Questions:
In the middle of a dinner party with friends, Alice takes five minutes to check Facebook (p 114). Can you relate to Alice’s reliance on the Internet and addiction to social networking? Do you think this is acceptable behavior—for adults, teens, or persons of any age?

Any thoughts on the developing relationship between William and Caroline, particularly how it is so similar to the way William and Alice started their relationship (going for runs where they often flirted, even though he was in a committed relationship)? Would you be comfortable with the early morning runs and cooking sessions if you were Alice?

We found the scene between Alice and her daughter Zoe at the diner to be a bit upsetting, mainly because  while Zoe is crying, Alice proceeds to check her phone when it chimes, showing a lack of interest in her daughter. Discuss.

The relationship between Wife22 and Researcher101 developed quite a bit in this section of the book. Although most of their discussions are short but they get increasingly more flirty. Considering how much the Researcher knows about Alice through her answers, it might make sense that he develops an attraction to her personality. But Alice (Wife22) knows very little about the researcher. How do you explain her attraction to someone she knows very little about?

What are your reactions after reading the first 195 pages of the book? What relationships and plot developments are you eager to read more of?

Week 3 Assignment:
Read up to page 294 (Chapter 84) for next week’s discussion! Come back on Monday, July 22 where we’ll post questions and discuss.

Join Us at the End of the Month:
The last week of July, we’ll host a formal book club webcast meeting! The live chat conference will include a video feed with the author, Melanie Gideon, Everygirl editors, and a Random House representative, as well as live video questions from readers!

It’s not too late to join in! Grab a copy of Wife 22 and join us next week as we continue discussing the book!

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100001012253257 Donna Benson

    hold on a sec…the week 2 was up to 195 wasn’t it? these questions address week 3 and are basically giving away plot lines…eeks!

    • http://theeverygirl.com/ The Everygirl

      Oy vey – you’re right! A thousand apologies – the wrong post went up, but it has since been corrected! We hope it didn’t spoil too much… thank you so much for participating!

  • Mrs Type A

    I hated the fact that Alice got up to check Facebook at a dinner party.  Of course, we all can relate to the reliance on social networking… it’s everywhere and can be very addictive!  I’m guilty of it sometimes, just as everyone else is…. but you have to force yourself to remain present and interact with the (real, live!) people in front of you rather than those online.  I don’t think this is acceptable for people of any age.  I sometimes worry that kids and teens growing up today will develop such an entrenched reliance on technology that they will miss out on the little things in life and fail to pick up important lessons about communication with other people that they’ll need some day in the working world. 

    The relationship between William and Caroline did begin to make me a bit nervous during this portion of the book.  It sort of bothered me that it didn’t seem to be bothering Alice that they were running and cooking together, because I feel like it would have certainly bothered me if I were her. 

    • http://twitter.com/DreamGreenDIY Carrie Waller

      I agree…It is frustrating to me too that Alice isn’t picking up on the relationship between Caroline and William. I am mentally screaming at her to nip it in the bud.

    • http://twitter.com/ClarissaFidler Clarissa Fidler

      I’ve been totally surprised that Alice hasn’t been bothered about Caroline and William’s relationship. I think it shows how absorbed and distracted she is by her increasingly intimate correspondence with Researcher 101.

      • http://www.agirlaheart.com/ Melanie Stone

        I KNOW!!! How does she NOT see the love building there?!? She is so wrapped up in her own problems that she doesn’t notice…

        • Mary

           She’s too busy “facebooking” to notice…

      • http://twitter.com/CaitPBrown Caitlin Brown

        My thoughts exactly lately. I can’t help but get so irritated with her at this part of the book. I just want to shake her! 

      • Chloe

        This is driving me nuts as well! I think Caroline is even realizing it’s a problem since she keeps suggesting Alice get back into her running groove so that she can be William’s running buddy again instead of her (she must feel like she’s stepping on peoples’ toes) Plus, if I were Alice I would be a bit threatened by a twenty-something living in my home–not that I would think anything would necessarily come of it, but just that I would compare myself to this younger version of me and probably find that as motivation to better myself and marriage.

  • http://twitter.com/DreamGreenDIY Carrie Waller

    Although I think it can definitely be inappropriate (and sometimes downright rude), I am absolutely guilty of social network addiction…I can’t help but think that life is so much more open and colorful with easy connection to SO many people via the web. I would have to draw the line at checking the Internet during a dinner party though…

    I am definitely picking up on some kind of intimate comfort between William and Caroline…It’s so subtle though. I HOPE that nothing comes of it, but I’m anxious to see. Caroline seems so interested in Alice that I’m hoping she (Caroline) won’t let anything come of it.

    Alice needs to see what’s right in front of her. She’s being selfish. I feel so badly for Zoe. I’m hoping for some kind of wake-up call for Alice, although her daughter breaking down in front of her should have been just that.

    The relationship between Researcher101 and Alice seems to be snowballing faster and faster…My guess is that Alice is “getting high” off of the interest and flirtation from Researcher101, which makes sense since she’s not getting it from home (although sometimes I feel like she turns her back on what could be connections with family members).

    I am still very much enjoying the book but do cringe at some of our protagonist’s decisions…At first, I regarded her as a 40-something-year-old woman, but the more I see her obsession with the Internet and with Researcher101, I’m getting a sort of immature vibe. She seems to be regressing and that scares me for her sake…I am waiting with bated breath for that wake-up call…

    • diane @ a spot of whimsy

      totally agree that she’s acting insanely immature and i don’t have as much sympathy as i did in the first quarter of the book.  william may have issues that are affecting their relationship but she has just as many of her own and she’s not noticing them at ALL at this point.  it can be very frustrating as a reader.

      • http://twitter.com/CaitPBrown Caitlin Brown

        While I definitely agree that I feel way less sympathy for her now than I did at the beginning…I have to be honest and say that I still relate to her (in my worst, selfish state, not how I normally am).

        Its nothing to be proud of but I think she’s very blinded by desperation for the understanding and attention that Researcher 101 gives her, which is causing her to make poor decisions. Again, I don’t condone this at all and I agree it’s frustrating, but for me I find it frustrating because I think I’ve definitely been in the position before where I wish someone would have shaken ME for acting so desperate and blinded and making poor decisions in the matter of relationships. 

        I definitely have much more sympathy for William at this point in the novel, however. At the start of the book I thought I would really despise him, but that’s not been the case as I continue to read.

  • Amanda S

    Just read the book this weekend and loved it!

  • http://aglassofmilk.wordpress.com/ jennie

    My copy just came in at the library…can’t wait to jump in and join the fun.  Thanks ladies.

    • Mary

       Yay! You’re going to LOVE it!

  • colettej222

    I feel bad for Alice.  Her husband doesn’t talk to her.  Her daughter doesn’t seem to like her.  Her job involves helicopter moms complaining about everything she does.  Then this guy comes along who listens to her and makes her feel good, I can see why she’d get sucked into an inappropriate online relationship. 

    • http://twitter.com/CaitPBrown Caitlin Brown

      Agreed…I dont know if I feel *bad* for her as much, but I can completely understand how she is getting sucked into it. Desperation is not a pretty trait, but it rears its ugly head for all of us at one time or another.

  • diane @ a spot of whimsy

    william and caroline’s runs: so far, there does not seem to be any interest between the two of them, but it still leaves me uneasy.  both alice and william seem to be leaving little cries for help for the other person – and neither are picking up the hints.  i was absolutely shocked by alice’s reaction to william saying, “i’d rather run with you.”  “he’s lying.”  really, alice?  it seemed extremely genuine to me, as did caroline’s discusison with alice about how william misses her.  yet she dismissed it and IMMEDIATELY wondered if researcher 101 is a runner.  this?  not ok. 

    i find myself more and more frustrated with alice and less sympathetic.  i wish i could get inside william’s head a little bit.  the more i’m in alice’s the more i blame her, which may not be fair.  but i knew the more entrenched she became in the researcher 101 relationship, the less she would try to save her marriage.  i still can’t totally buy that the researcher would fall so hard for her and break his ethical code by joining facebook and giving her little bits of his life (and his possibly failing marriage), but accepting that fact, i just can’t believe how hurtful she’s acting not only to william, but her children too, like the moment at the restaurant with zoe, as you guys mentioned. 

    what did you guys think of the play and the “california girls” parody sung by the geese?  i found it…confusing.  i doubt it’s the end of the saga of her job as a drama teacher, and hopefully this storyline will come together better then. 

    i loved alice’s story about her wedding day and what her father said to her: “off you go, honey.”  i’m a sucker for father-daugther moments like that :)

    i also want to go back to the “small life” comment from the first quarter of the book, as i can’t stop thinking about it and have done some self-analyzing (oy vey) on why it’s stuck with me so much.  does anyone else remember the line from you’ve got mail where kathleen kelly is musing to NY152 (another anonymous online relationship – hmm!) about how she leads “a small life.   – well, valuable, but small – and sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven’t been brave?  So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn’t it be the other way around? I don’t really want an answer. I just want to send this cosmic question out into the void. So good night, dear void.”

    one of my most favorite little speeches from that movie, in that it has also stuck with me all these years.  the difference, i think, between kathleen kelly’s acknowledging that she may lead a small life and william’s comment that alice does, is who the comment is coming from.  kathleen is almost accepting this about herself, while the comment and the stigma is being forced upon alice.  which reminds me of an early episode of friends (bear with me here, i realize my comparisons aren’t all that high brow) – the one with the list.  after rachel discovers that ross made a pro/con list as to whether to date her or julie, she tries to explain why it hurt her so bad: “imagine the worst things you think about yourself.  how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the world not
    only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.”  that’s the kind of hurt i see in william’s small life remark, whether he means it to or not. 

    and now i just talked way too much about a two word phrase, and i’m officially done :)

    • Mary Mullen

       The California Girls Parody left me confused as well.. I agree, I am starting to feel less and less sympathetic for Alice and sometimes wish she’d open her eyes and STOP with always being on her phone/computer. That’s one of my pet peeve’s in life!

  • http://www.adesignsovast.com/ Lindsey

    Love this book!!  Can’t wait to read along here.  xox

  • Nora O

    It bugged me that Alice did check Facebook in the middle of the party. It just showed that things were getting serious and the situation was not going in a good direction. I do relate somewhat. There are many times I’m at dinner and find myself checking my phone. I have made it a point to leave it in my purse. I do not think this is acceptable behavior. I think it can be rude whether your just with one other person or an entire group.
    It did cross my mind that the runs between William and Caroline were similar to his and Alice’s run. But Caroline is a different person. I don’t think she’d every cross a line.

  • http://twitter.com/ClarissaFidler Clarissa Fidler

    Social networking seems to be playing a large role in shaping Alice’s story. I find myself annoyed with her constant need to check Facebook rather than engaging with her family. Put the phone down Alice!! I think as the story progresses Alice’s social media addiction is going to catch up with her. This is the first book I’ve read where social media plays any type of role. The author is definitely in tune with the issues we face on a day to day basis.

  • http://www.agirlaheart.com/ Melanie Stone

    On the topic of Alice’s social media addiction, I can’t help but relate. I recently read a blog post about how we should stop putting our phones on the table during meals. This totally made me think of me (and Alice). The reliance on Twitter/Facebook/etc is so extreme in this day and age – I think that’s a big point that Melanie Gideon was trying to make with this book!!! 

    p.s. I think we should all try to put our phones away during meals :) A challenge!!! 

    • http://twitter.com/DreamGreenDIY Carrie Waller

      AMEN! =)

    • Mary Mullen

       The phone thing is getting old! And I’m young! I can’t imagine how my parent’s generation feels about the lack of face-to-face communication. It’s quite disturbing!

      • http://twitter.com/ClarissaFidler Clarissa Fidler

        Ironically in my own family, my dad is the worst offender! It drives my mom crazy how much he likes Facebook.

  • http://livingmylifeasiknowit.wordpress.com/ Christina Tamm

    I
    can so relate to Alice and her reliance on the Internet. I probably check my facebook/twitter/wordpress/instagram/pinterest
    50 times a day.  I wish I could just put
    the phone away for a while but I feel so unconnected to everything when I
    do.  I don’t think it is acceptable
    behavior for anyone. I think our society relies on such things way too much and
    I am a prime example of that.

     

    I
    think the relationship between William and Carline is harmless due to her age.
    The only affect I think it could be having on William is making him feel young
    again. If I were Alice I don’t think I would be comfortable with the early
    morning runs and cooking session but I would be jealous that William didn’t
    want to do those things with me.

     

    I
    feel horrible for Zoe in that situation. If my mother was to check her facebook
    or phone for any matter while I was trying to have a heart to heart with her or
    if I was just darn right talking to her and breaking down, I’d probably freak
    out on her.

     

    I
    think Wife22’s attraction to Researcher 101 is purely attention based. She
    enjoys the attention she is receiving from Researcher 101 and it is causing her
    to become attracted to him. I think Researcher 101 has stepped out of line when
    it it comes to facebooking her. He should have stuck to the standard survey
    thing. Email a set of questions and a response and that’s it.  Don’t get me wrong Wife22’s reaction and
    involvement with Researcher 101 makes me angry.  

     

    My
    reactions after the first 195 pages is I can’t put the thing down. I always
    want to know what is coming up next. It’s an interesting plot but one I think
    many people can relate too.. 

    • http://twitter.com/CaitPBrown Caitlin Brown

      completely agree with you. i find the book so riveting because of how relatable the feelings are, even if the situation isn’t for everyone. 

    • http://twitter.com/ClarissaFidler Clarissa Fidler

       I completely agree with you about Researcher 101 crossing the line by accepting Alice’s Facebook request (Alice is out of line too but we already knew that). When I read that I was like uh, excuse me!??!

  • mary kay logan

    At this point in the book I am so angry at Alice. She wants to work on her relationships but seems to have forgotten how. Every conversation she has with 101 should be with her husband. She has forgotten how to have a face to face relationship and you see that struggle with each person in her family. I want to put my hands through the pages and just shake some since into her. 

    The book is good – gripping and almost begs for you to keep reading it. 

    While I am so frustrated with Alice and wonder how she could act the way she does, she is very much like some women that I know – oblivious to the world around them – not realizing that everything is slipping away even thought the rest of the world can see it coming a mile a way. All that is needed is a few simple personal things to heal and comfort but outside blinders ( i.e. Facebook) keep distance and immediate pleasure as an easier outlet.
     

  • http://twitter.com/penelopespress debbie

    just finished the book last night.  i picked it up the other day and was quickly trying to catch up to be on par w/ the assignment, but then couldn’t put the book down and finished it in one day!  loved the book.  i don’t want to give away any parts for those that haven’t finished, so i’m looking forward to commenting more next week.  like the last comment by mary kay logan, i felt the same way towards alice.  that she’s oblivious and should be having those intimate conversations with her husband rather than researcher 101.  great build up and foreshadowing throughout the book.  so many issues that i can relate to in this book, motherhood, friendship, marriage, addiction to social media!  great pick as the first read for TEG!  looking forward to discussing the book more when everyone’s finished and cannot wait for the next book selection!

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