Sex and the City was (and is) an amazing show to watch in your 20s. A lot of what the girls go through is relatable, especially when it comes to the challenges and triumphs of their relationships with one another. That said, watching SATC in your 30s is a totally different experience—it hits much closer to home, uncovering both the uncomfortable and hilarious truths of life in this decade and the milestones encountered along the way. Here, 11 times the show brilliantly nailed the unique realities of your 30s.
The Lil Me Activity Chair Moment
The “A Woman’s Right To Shoes” episode opens with a montage in which Carrie buys various gifts for various friends celebrating various milestones (e.g. engagement, marriage, baby). This seemingly endless phase of life definitely starts in your 20s, but it reaches critical mass in your early 30s when the second wave of women you know get married, half of those already married are on to their first baby and the rest are on to baby number who-knows-what. When Carrie says, “I am Santa!” with respect to the number of non-birthday-related gifts she’s bought for friends over the years, we are right there with her. It’s likely we could’ve put a down payment on a house with all the dough we’ve doled out to dear ones in these incessantly celebratory years.
The Shoe-Shame Incident
In the same episode, Carrie’s married-with-kids friend takes her to task for spending $400-plus on a pair of shoes, though she once did the same before she had “priorities.” If you’re childless in your 30s, you might recognize this shaming as an inevitable and probably involuntary by-product of the sacrifice that comes with parenthood. These new moms don’t mean to make you feel bad, but this type of behavior is common nonetheless. And yes, as a single woman in your 30s, you’ve probably considering registering for yourself, as Carrie did, at some point.
When Samantha Gets Sick
Being single in your 30s can be pretty great, until you get sick. Then, it’s the end of times, and all you can do is call your mom crying to bemoan the fact that you never got married. Samantha’s storyline in the episode “All or Nothing” perfectly captures the direness of this moment as even she, the most confidently single woman of all time, is reduced to a puddle of regret over her relationships status in the face of the flu.
When Charlotte Says This…
“I’ve been dating since I was 15. I’m exhausted. Where is he?!?” Amen, sister.
When Miranda Chokes
Single women of any age are afraid of dying alone in their apartments and subsequently being eaten by feral cats. It’s just a thing. Somehow, though, that fear becomes more real in your 30s, perhaps because roommates are no longer the norm. This moment brings that fear to life, and we especially relate to the panic Miranda feels around what should be a huge, celebration-worthy achievement—buying her own apartment. Your 30s seem to be full of these types of double-edge-sword moments when you’re single.
The Time Carrie Tries to Recycle
If you’re single in your 30s, chances are you will at some point try to recycle someone notable from your past as a love interest simply because the thought of starting from scratch is exhausting. Hopefully, he won’t be—as Carrie’s high-school boyfriend is in this episode—living in a mental institution.
So, maybe she didn’t fall out of a window to her untimely death after proclaiming “I’m so bored I could die,” but if you’re in your 30s, there is a good chance you know someone like Lexi Featherstone, who serves as a cautionary tale against staying at the party too long. See also: the episode in which pregnant ex-party-friend Laney tries to take off her shirt in order to reclaim her wild youth before it’s too late (spoiler alert: It’s already too late).
Charlotte’s Baby Grief
When Charlotte miscarries the baby she so badly wants, our hearts break. When she understandably doesn’t think she can attend Miranda’s baby’s birthday party afterward, we get it. Whether you’re the woman who’s experienced fertility troubles or you’re someone who’s watched a friend go through them, this plot point likely resonates. It can be difficult in your 30s to celebrate the milestones of others if you’re not also headed in that direction, and sometimes it’s okay to practice self-care instead. (Though for the record, Charlotte does rally… with a little help from Elizabeth Taylor.)
The Down Payment Revelation
After Aiden moves out of Carrie’s apartment post-breakup, he tells her she can buy it back from him, at which point Carrie realizes she has no money. This part isn’t uber-realistic—trust us, as a writer, we know we have no money. The moment that is relatable, however, is the one in which Carrie thinks she’s spent just $4K on shoes until Miranda points out to her that she’s actually spent $40K. We’re using Carrie as more of a cautionary tale to keep your finances in check, always.
When you’re in your 30s and you want kids, procreation is likely a factor you’ll consider when trying to choose a mate, even in the early stages of dating. Even if you’re not personally thinking about it, trust us, other people will point out how inappropriate your choice of man is if he’s not on the marriage-and-kids path. In the “Catch-38” episode, Carrie is forced to question whether Petrovsky, who doesn’t want more children, will love her enough to make up for the fact that she gave up kids for him. We love Samantha’s response to this dilemma more than anything: “There are a lot of fabulous things in life that don’t involve a baby. What would that look like?”
Samantha’s Reaction To Carrie’s Wedding
When Carrie says, “I want you to be my maid of honor. How do you feel about that?” Samantha responds, “The same way you feel about Botox. Painful and unnecessary.” Yep.