"There’s something so special about the objects we keep—especially the ones passed down through generations. They hold so much more than just form or function. They tie us to something bigger than ourselves. Family heirlooms can remind us of people we love, places we’ve been, and lives lived before ours. As a hopeless romantic and as someone who is always searching for deeper meaning, my home is sprinkled with second-hand treasures and a few family heirlooms, including a set of my grandmother’s vintage napkins. When I inherited the set, I wasn’t sure what to do with them at first. But now, years later, they’ve become part of how I connect—to her memory, to my mom, and to my friends and family that gather around my own table.
I first saw the napkins as my mom was decluttering her attic. I braced myself as she asked if I could help her sort through things—I simply wasn’t in the mood to dig through my collection of CDs from the 4th grade or sift through old finger paintings. I was surprised to see, however, an assortment of items not from my childhood but from my mom’s. She asked if there was anything that caught my eye that I’d like to keep, and my gaze drifted towards the green scalloped edges and pretty embroidered flowers on the cotton napkins.
My mom told me those were a gift from my grandmother, an avid cruiser, that she must have picked up on one of her travels. I immediately pictured my grandmother in a flowy caftan, chatting with other cruisers with an air of joyousness and her signature flair. I remember growing up, my dad and my uncles would call her the “bella donna” or beautiful lady in Italian. She certainly was, and as I’ve gotten older, I wish I had the chance to know her as an adult. She passed away when I was in high school, and even if I can’t go back in time to chat with her now, the napkins make me feel closer to her. Even though, at the time, I had no idea when I was going to use 12 cotton napkins, I took them anyway.
“I feel like I’m now taking up the reins, and even simply inviting people into my home makes me feel connected to these two very important women in my life, and the napkins have become a physical representation of that lineage.”
I remember delicately folding the napkins, placing them in a box, and tucking the box away in a closet with no plans of using them. They’re so beautiful, and since they were more than 50 years old, I didn’t want to ruin them. Plus, I wasn’t throwing dinner parties or eating fancy meals, which is the kind of event these napkins demanded. I told myself these are strictly special occasion napkins, and even then, I wanted to treat them with the utmost care. So when a special occasion finally arose, I decided to take two of them out for my wedding anniversary. My husband and I took a picnic lunch to a cidery, and I truthfully couldn’t fully enjoy our meal because I didn’t want the napkins to get dirty. I kept thinking how precious and old these things were—what if they get stained? What if I ruin them? I generally don’t like getting anything dirty, but the thought of destroying my grandmother’s vintage embroidered napkins made me hide them away (again!) for another year. They’re meant to be preserved, I told myself, so let’s preserve them.
It wasn’t until this year that I had a change of heart. In an effort to stay connected with my friends, I’ve made it a goal to host at least once a month. This is the first time I’ve ever had friends over for dinner and the first time I’ve ever truly had a need for pretty, reusable napkins. As I pulled the set out of hiding, I realized I was stifling my own joy by not using them. I thought about my bella donna grandma, who certainly wouldn’t have wanted these gorgeous napkins collecting dust. I thought of my mom, too, who has hosted family and friends for most of her adult life. Both my grandmother and my mom get immense joy from gathering, feeding their loved ones, and spending quality time with family. I feel like I’m now taking up the reins, and even simply inviting people into my home makes me feel connected to these two very important women in my life, and the napkins have become a physical representation of that lineage.
“Special objects that connect you to your loved ones can’t be bought in a store—they’re tucked away in attics, waiting to be found.”
It’s so cool seeing my friends’ faces light up as they take in the tablescape at our dinner parties, with the napkins front and center of every place setting. I’ve definitely fielded the question, “Is it ok if we use these?” a few times, and I now respond with a friendly, “Of course you can!” Instead of being tucked away, I store them in a hosting closet filled with dinner party essentials I use monthly. I don’t fret when I wash and dry them—these are in regular rotation, and I couldn’t be more tickled. I think of my grandmother, smiling proudly and feeling happy that they’re now being put to good use. Finally! I’m reminded every time I use them that they are so much more than just napkins. They tether me to a line of incredible hostesses, and I hope the line continues even after I’m gone.
So the next time your mom asks you to sort through boxes stored in the attic, try hard not to roll your eyes. Sure, you might uncover old report cards you’d rather not revisit, but you might also stumble upon something more meaningful. I never would have guessed I’d go home with a set of my grandmother’s vintage napkins that day, but I now know that storage spaces can hold tiny treasures if you look hard enough. Special objects that connect you to your loved ones can’t be bought in a store—they’re tucked away in attics, waiting to be found.
Kristen Garaffo, Contributing Home & Living Writer
Kristen Garaffo is a Washington DC-area-based freelance writer. She specializes in home and lifestyle content and loves helping others live their best lives at home and beyond.
Feature graphic images credited to: Anastasia Morozova | Dupe, Linda Rodriguez | Dupe