7 Things Girls With High Self-Esteem Do in Relationships

Remember How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days? Sometimes, that on-screen, disastrous relationship feels a lot more like ours than it should. To remedy this, we decided to do some thinking on what sets our confident friends apart from, well, us when it comes to relationships. Here, seven things they do differently.


#1 – They maintain their own lives.

Confident girls aren’t at the beck and call of a boy. They don’t stop hanging out with their friends, going to workout classes they love, or otherwise ditching their lives just because they’re in a relationship. Nothing is sexier in any partnership than both parties maintaining their independent selves.


#2 – They don’t ask where it’s all going.

There’s no reason why it should just be assumed that men are in charge of the relationship timeline. Maybe you’re the one who determines the pace of your relationship. You can be, easily, and most confident women are.


#3 – They ask for what they want.

Don’t mistake the prior piece of advice to mean we’re shaming you for asking for marriage if that’s what you want. Girls with high self-esteem are never afraid that asking for their needs to be met will end a relationship, because if they don’t get what they want or need, they’re the ones who will walk.


#4 – They don’t get jealous.

We have some guy friends who are no longer allowed to hang out with us now that they’re in a romantic partnership. Somehow, this doesn’t feel like the hallmark of a secure relationship. Confident girls know that if their significant other wanted to be with someone else, they would be, and therefore they’re not prone to irrational jealousy.


#5 – They aren’t afraid to challenge things.

When you’re insecure in a relationship, it can be difficult to stick up for yourself. Girls with high self-esteem, however, have no trouble expressing anger, frustration or disappointment when it comes to the men in their lives.


#6 – They don’t post to social media every two seconds.

We don’t know about you, but when we see someone starting to up the number of relationship-oriented photos in their feed significantly, particularly when accompanied with hashtags like “#love”, we immediately sense trouble. Confident girls don’t need anyone to “like” their relationship—it’s an everyday part of their lives that isn’t any more remarkable than the rest of what they do or experience in a day.


#7 – They don’t blame themselves when it ends.

Confident girls know that relationships end for complex reasons that have nothing to do with their figure, something they said or any type of deficiency they might perceive in themselves.


This post originally ran on The Zoe Report on May 3, 2017

  • This is a very interesting post! It give me food for thought!!

  • This is a very interesting post! It give me food for thought!!

  • stefaniarocks

    I’ve just discovered I am a girl with high self-esteem…good to know 😉 😉

  • Nikki Laraja

    Great post, I feel like I am pretty good at most of these, but have to work more on #1 going forward, it’s so easy to get tangled into a significant others life, but so important to maintain your own!


  • Mallory Marie

    Love this. Number 6 especially. I get that it’s okay to do every now and then, but women (and men!) who constantly feed off of “likes” from posts about #love or #mancrusheveryday 5 times a week, just look insecure and unhappy. Highlight reels are not real! Thank you for sharing this article!!

  • Tuesday White

    Oh my goodness, this was spot on!!! I’m working on my Diary Series on my own blog and I’ve got an article coming up that’s got a bit of a twist on this!
    Thanks for the push forward with it!
    http://www.tuesdaywhite.com – Tuesday White – Contemporary Insight for Women

  • This is really interesting! #4 I found interesting, I don’t necessarily think a guy who can’t hang out with girls has a jealous girlfriend I see it as a respect thing. My husband and I don’t hang out with friends of the opposite sex unless we’re in a group out of respect for each other. Great article though!

    • Brenna Lynn Martin

      completely agree!

  • Adaeze Chianumba Okezie

    I agree totally with this.

  • Abi Norris

    I strongly agree with these points, and I’m proud to say I, too, have high self esteem. After just recently getting in a fairly serious relationship, I’ve noticed the things my other friends freak out about don’t necessarily matter to me. In addition, I can honestly say if my boyfriend/person of interest decides to leave me, it’ll be his loss. It’s good to feel confident!

  • Jacqueline Husar Moshref

    I’m a HUGE advocate of #1…as a spot-on Aquarian, I demand “spaces in our togetherness”. I want, crave, NEED alone time. It’s the insecure man who doesn’t get that…or how much better the “getting together” can be!

  • Chelsea Takemoto

    I think girls with high self esteem don’t need an article to tell them that they have high self esteem and why, but to each their own.

  • Mysterious Girl

    Stupid article Chrissy teigen is one of the most insecure women in the world her non stop trolling on Twitter and videoing herself naked constantly why did you use her image total contradiction because you fancy her is it dumbass

  • This is a great post and so true. I’m currrently single but when I next get into a relationship I think I will be able to do most of these and number 1 is by far the most important!

  • This is a great post and so true. I’m currrently single but when I next get into a relationship I think I will be able to do most of these and number 1 is by far the most important!