"If there’s one thing I am sure of, it’s that when it comes to pleasure and intimacy, there is no such thing as a “one-size-fits-all” approach. Despite what you might think (and what pop culture tells us, let’s be real), stimulation of the clitoris, vagina, or penis are not the only ways to reach an earth-shattering orgasm. Believe it or not, nipples are an extremely underestimated erogenous zone for many people regardless of gender, and there are infinite ways to stimulate them to make that big O even better. Nipple play has become a staple of my sexual pleasure, and I only wish I’d learned the intricacies of it sooner. Ahead, I’m sharing a little about what nipple play is, how to know if it’s right for you, and how to get started experimenting with it for yourself!
What is nipple play?
You might be thinking, “Of course, I know what nipple play is” and to be honest, I thought I did, too. But there are so many ways and techniques to enhance pleasure through direct and indirect stimulation, so it’s good to start at the beginning. Simply put, nipple play is a technique that involves stimulating the nipple and areola for sexual pleasure. Nipples are packed with hundreds of nerve endings that, when stimulated, activate the genital sensory cortex—the same part of the brain that’s aroused by clitoral stimulation. Nipple play can be used as foreplay, to enhance penetration or clitoral stimulation during sex, or by itself as the main event. In theory, you can achieve an orgasm through nipple play alone, however, since intimacy and sexual pleasure are entirely individual, there is no rulebook to follow that will be fool-proof for everyone.
How to know if nipple play is right for you
It may take some time and experimentation to find what kind of touch works for you—or if it’s even your vibe at all. According to Alyssa Dweck, MD, a gynecologist in Westchester, New York, nipple sensitivity can be affected by genetics, breast surgeries, or other procedures done on the upper body—it is truly a case-by-case situation. When it comes to beginning nipple play, it’s important to listen to and check in with your body, and focus on the pleasure you’re feeling instead of making it a goal to orgasm, which isn’t always about the destination when it comes to sex.
I always recommend exploring sensations alone to find out what you like. Masturbation is an important tool when it comes to understanding your desires and communicating them with a partner, should you choose. If you’re looking to get into nipple play with a SO, the first step is to engage in an honest conversation about your desires, your limits, and your boundaries. Open lines of communication are key when it comes to experimentation, and it may be worth it to establish a safe word or signal, should the stimulation become too intense. Ultimately, nipple play can be an extremely pleasurable addition to your sexual repertoire, but it’s all about trial and error and doing what’s best for you.
How to experiment with nipple play
Start with fingers
Play with slow, circular motions over the nipple and surrounding areola to begin. Once you determine your body’s reaction to subtle stimulation, experiment with pressure, pinches, duration, and speed. Don’t limit yourself—there is no wrong answer. You can even try giving your nipples a pull or a twist until you find the kind of stimulation that works for you. Using lubrication before any kind of intense nipple rolling, pinching, or rubbing can prevent dry friction or unwanted chafing around the area. I recommend trying a CBD-based lube to increase blood flow to the area, making even the most gentle of sensations swoon-worthy.
Move to the mouth
If you’re looking to involve a partner, there are various ways to engage in nipple play with the mouth. Your partner can start by breathing hot air around and on your nipple to warm up the nerve endings, then move to licking, sucking, or nibbling/biting. Asking your partner to draw your nipples into their mouth through a sucking motion will increase blood flow to the area, thus increasing sensitivity—so pay attention to the cues from your body. Alternate techniques to find what feels best to both of you and what each of you is comfortable with. If looking to add an extra dose of lubrication, opt for a flavored lube to enhance pleasure for both parties.
Add toys
If you want to add that extra bit of spice to your nipple play, you can introduce extra sensations such as lotions, clamps, vibrators, ice, or ties. Use oils or ice cubes to create an instant nipple erection and tease. Nipple vibes are also great choices and can be hands-free, allowing hands to roam towards other erogenous zones on the body. Depending on your comfort level, clamps can be worn loose for a subtle effect or tightly for a kinkier approach to nipple play. Even if you don’t have any nipple-specific toys, household items such as hot wax, paintbrushes, and lotions are wonderful substitutions.
Products that will enhance nipple play
Made with just two clean ingredients—400 milligrams broad-spectrum CBD and organic coconut oil – this oil is designed to provide all-natural lubrication, ease discomfort, enhance arousal, and in this case, assist with any friction or chaffing that might occur during nipple play.
Organic coconut oil, vanilla essence, beeswax, and stevia make up this lube that tastes and smells just like a vanilla cupcake, making it a total treat to use during nipple play.
This all-natural balm was designed to be enjoyed on the nipples of both men and women, alike. It can be applied to various places on the body when you want to experiment with different sensations.
These rechargeable nipplettes have 12 powerful functions and fully adjustable clamps so that you can start slow and experiment with the intensity that you like the best in order to reach the big O.
These suckers are beginner-friendly and perfect for hands-free nipple stimulation—so that you can use them solo or wear them when your partner is busy stimulating another powerful erogenous zone.
Sydney Cox, Contributing Sex & Relationships Writer
Sydney Cox is a Chicago-based writer and intimacy coordinator who is passionate about exploring the complexities of human connections and teaching readers to advocate for themselves. Sydney’s work has been featured in various publications, where they aim to foster open and honest conversations.