Let’s face it: We can’t expect to always have a sex drive in high gear, and it takes more than just cueing Marvin Gaye’s “Let’s Get It On” to rev it up. First things first, it’s normal and common to experience ebbs and flows in your libido. But we all deserve to reap the benefits of sexual pleasure—I’m talking less anxiety, better sleep, relief from headaches, and more. So while you can’t change your libido with the snap of a finger, there are natural remedies that can help take your sexual desire from womp womp to bow-chicka-wow-wow. Read on for seven ways to get you in the mood. The best part? There’s nothing fake about them, including the “Big O” they’ll likely lead to.
Add an adaptogen supplement to your routine
There may be no such thing as a love potion, but combine the stress-reducing and energy-boosting effects of adaptogens and you’ve got the next best thing. These plants and mushrooms can help regulate your body to return to balance, so if anxiety is getting the better of you, they step in to aid in reducing your cortisol levels. But their transformative benefits don’t stop there—the effects of adaptogens can spice things up in the bedroom. Enter: Moon Juice’s Sex Dust. Packed with a stimulating blend of adaptogens and herbs that target stress to support healthy hormonal balance, libido, and creative energy, knocking boots just got way more exciting.
Add the natural libido supplement to your coffee, tea, or smoothie, or pair it with your favorite chocolate. With ingredients that are traceable, potently-dosed, and easily absorbed, you can rest assured that your sexual health is getting the right kind of TLC. Use code EVERYGIRL10 to get 10% off one order, and get ready to ignite your sexual spark.
With a combination of Shatavari, Shilajit, Epimedium, Schisandra, Cacao, and Maca, this stimulating blend of adaptogens and herbs targets stress to support healthy hormonal balance, libido, and creative energy.
Use code EVERYGIRL10 for 10% off of your first order from Moon Juice!
Reach for aphrodisiac foods
We’ve all heard that aphrodisiacs are said to arouse sexual desire and pleasure. But are chocolate, oysters, and strawberries really that powerful? While there’s little scientific evidence that the rumored sexy stimulants are the real deal, there are food supplements that have been proven to help you get back in the saddle: maca, ginkgo biloba, fenugreek, and pistachio nuts, to name a few. From helping increase blood flow to promoting the production of sex hormones, consider these “aphrodisiacs” your natural libido-boosting friends. But at the end of the day, you can’t go wrong with eating a nutrient-dense, hormone-balancing diet (think: high-quality, pastured meats and eggs, fruits and veggies, and healthy fats like extra virgin olive oil and avocados).
Show your pelvic floor some love
If you’ve ever done a kegel exercise, you’re already ahead of the game (bravo!). The group of muscles that form a bowl-like shape between your sit bones (AKA your pelvic floor) is responsible for giving you the best “O” you’ve ever had and preventing you from peeing in your pants in bumper-to-bumper traffic. In other words, you have your pelvic floor to thank for enjoying sex and controlling your bladder and bowel movements. One red flag that your pelvic floor could use a tune-up? You guessed it, a low libido. The good news? You can improve your pelvic floor health and, in turn, your sex drive by seeking pelvic floor therapy, practicing yoga, foam rolling, and performing exercises that strengthen and target the muscle group.
Get plenty of sleep
PSA: Getting enough rest affects way more than just your beauty. Case in point: Studies show that sleep deprivation is linked to reduced sexual desire and arousal in women. When you snooze, your body restores energy and regulates hormone levels and the muscles and cells in your body repair and grow, so getting adequate sleep can make or break your sex life. Bottom line: Consistent quality sleep equals a healthy sex drive. As if you needed more reason to prioritize your Zzzs, for every additional hour of shuteye you get, your libido increases by 14%. So establish a wind-down routine (yoga stretches, anyone?), say no to caffeine after lunch, fit in movement in your day, and keep your sleeping environment at a cool to 65°F to 72°F to recharge your body and mind. The result? A heightened libido.
Consider a natural alternative to hormonal birth control
Chances are you’ve been on or are currently on a type of hormonal contraceptive. And it’s no secret that hormonal birth control methods have unwelcome physical and sexual side effects, including a diminished libido. I hate to be the bearer of more bad news: A study concluded that women using a hormonal contraceptive approach experienced less frequent sexual activity, arousal, pleasure, and orgasm.
So what’s a girl to do? Fortunately, there are natural alternatives to hormonal contraceptives. From good ol’ condoms and the “pull-out” tactic to silicone diaphragms and cervical caps, there’s no shortage of hormone-free birth control options available. Since narrowing down the best non-hormonal birth control for you should take into account the risks and benefits of each type as well as your lifestyle and personal needs, have a chat with your OBGYN and don’t be afraid to ask any questions you may have, no matter how embarrassing they may seem (there are no stupid questions after all).
Give your self-confidence a boost
When you look at yourself in the mirror, what do you see and say to yourself? If it’s not your attributes and uplifting self-talk, we’ve got work to do (myself included). Because how we feel about ourselves and our bodies affects what goes (or doesn’t go) down between the sheets. It goes without saying that if you focus on your perceived flaws (“I wish I could get rid of the cellulite on my thighs” or “I’m not talented enough to get my dream job”), you’re not going to want to get it on. Instead, try shifting your mindset and bringing attention to your strengths, practicing words of affirmation, or hitting your favorite workout class to release those feel-good endorphins. While you’re at it, get in tune with your body, discover what arouses you, and take note of your major turn-ons (journaling always FTW). The main takeaway? Enhance your self-esteem and your sex life will thank you.
Communicate with your partner and/or a trusted practitioner
Let’s be real: Talking to your partner or your doctor about your low sex drive is anything but sexy and can be awkward AF. But what if I told you that talking about your sex life reinforces not only your relationship, but also your sexual satisfaction? And when you have a stronger emotional connection with your S.O., the chances of having mind-blowing sex gets a whole lot higher.
Now that I have your attention, when the time is right (read: when you’re both calm and relaxed), bite the bullet and kick off the conversation with something like, “This is really uncomfortable for me, but can we find a time for me to share something about our sex life with you?” If that feels totally out of reach, use a movie, TV show, or article you can relate to as a conversation starter. Once you’ve got your heart-to-heart going, be open and honest about how you’re feeling and what you want and need. Try not to leave out the details to help your partner understand what you’re experiencing while not placing any blame on them. Remember that your sex issues won’t get solved overnight, so maintaining an open and ongoing dialogue is key.
Say you’ve given communication with your partner and the aforementioned remedies the old college try and your libido hasn’t budged, don’t brush it aside. Seek a trusted professional, whether an OBGYN or therapist, to get to the bottom of it. Whatever the cause, having a healthy libido and fulfilling sex life is your right.
This post contains a sponsored inclusion of Moon Juice, but all of the opinions within are those of The Everygirl editorial board.