Have you ever been in a seemingly perfect relationship when you get blindsided by a red flag you never noticed before (or were in denial about)? Chances are there were warning signs, but you didn’t recognize them at the time. That’s where astrology comes in. If you know the potential red flags to look out for ahead of time, you’ll be less likely to overlook or ignore them.
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While some signs get more hate than others (cough, cough, Scorpio and Gemini), it’s not that black and white. Every sign actually has good and bad personality traits, and each one has its own red flags. And being aware of those red flags can help you work through them and develop a healthy relationship. Or if your significant other refuses to change, it can let you know when to run. Plus, it’s not always the other person—you could be the one in the relationship giving off red flags, so you should know the dark side to your sign, as well.
Zodiac compatibility is about way more than just your sun sign, so it’s important to understand the red flags of your or your significant other’s Venus sign, too, since that’s the planet of love. And it doesn’t hurt to check your big three because those are the main components of your personality.
We’ve broken down the red flags by zodiac sign below—including how to handle them.
Red Flags By Zodiac Sign
Aries: Struggles Controlling Their Emotions
Aries are quick to anger and can easily blow up at a moment’s notice. They tend to always be on edge and ready to argue about anything, even small issues like deciding what to have for dinner. If their temper goes unchecked, you may feel like you’re constantly having arguments or walking on eggshells to avoid setting them off. Instead of yelling back at them, calmly explain your perspective—both of you getting angry doesn’t help anyone. It’s much harder to have a screaming match when one person is cool and collected.
Tauruses are represented by the bull because they’re extremely hard-headed. They’ll dig their heels in, which is a major problem when dating a Taurus, since all relationships require some level of compromise. If you find you’re always going along with whatever they want to avoid a useless argument (because they won’t back down), it’s time to make a change. Try to help them understand that a relationship can’t be one-sided, and they’ll have to be a little more flexible.
Geminis are chatty, so they tend to get caught up in gossip. While some gossip is harmless, like discussing the latest Vanderpump Rules drama, this can evolve into talking behind others’ backs. After all, the classic Gemini stereotype is that they’re two-faced. And if they’re saying bad things about their friends to you, it’s possible they’re doing the same behind your back. One way to handle this is to just not engage when they start gossiping. If you stop talking about it with them, they’ll eventually get the hint. Or be more straightforward about it and just tell them you don’t want to talk about other people.
Cancers are represented by the crab because they have a tough outer shell. Cancers are usually thought of as being kind and caring—and they are, but only once you get to know them. They can be standoffish around those they don’t know or don’t feel comfortable around. Or if you say something they don’t like, they might automatically shut down. Try to get them to discuss things with you in an argument rather than immediately going into defensive mode and refusing to talk about it.
Leo: Highly Self-Focused
Leos are known for loving the spotlight, but sometimes they can let it get to their head too much. You might notice they always put their own needs and interests before others or only want to talk about their problems. They may need constant validation and fish for compliments. The reality is that while Leos can come across as vain or self-involved, it’s usually a mask for their insecurities. There’s a difference between a person who’s actually arrogant and someone who’s just trying to hide their perceived flaws. Help them recognize their strengths so they don’t feel so insecure.
Virgo: Unrealistic Standards
Virgos are perfectionists, which is a useful trait to have in a lot of situations, like at work or school. But occasionally, Virgos can get carried away and set their standards so high that they’re practically impossible to reach—for themselves and for others. Nothing and no one can ever be good enough to meet their expectations. They might break up with someone for tiny, insignificant issues because they want their partner to be perfect. Learn to appreciate their eye for detail when it comes to things like cooking or organizing, but teach them that they’ll have to meet you halfway in other aspects of life.
Libra: Serial Dating
Libras want to always have a partner, so they’re often serial daters. They jump right from one relationship to the next. Of course no one wants to only be a rebound, but the bigger problem is that Libras don’t learn how to be alone if they’re constantly in a couple. If you’re dating a Libra, try to take it slow. Ask about their dating history early on to understand if they actually want to date you or if they’ll settle for anyone just because they want to get into another relationship.
Scorpios are mysterious, which makes them magnetic to dates and admirers. As a water sign, they’re very emotional, but they keep their feelings buried deep down. So while they may intrigue you and draw you in, you’ll have a lot more difficulty trying to get to know them. Take small steps to get them to reveal themselves gradually. If you go straight to their deepest fears and desires, they’ll likely shut down immediately. Once they do open up, Scorpios are one of the most loyal partners you could have.
Sagittarius: Too Impulsive
Sagittarians are a lot of fun, but they don’t always think things through. They’re always on the hunt for the next adventure and great at big picture things—like picking which country you should jet off to next—but they skip over essential details, like actually booking the hotel. They could end up dropping a ton of money on something that’s nonrefundable, for example. Their impulsivity can cause problems if you prefer to have a plan. Enjoy their spontaneity and positivity, but take over the planning for bigger events, like a week-long vacation.
Capricorn: All Work And No Play
You’ve probably heard the phrase, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy”—well, that saying was definitely about a Capricorn. It can be next to impossible to get a Capricorn to relax. Even on vacation, you’ll catch them checking their email or Slack. But one thing a Capricorn likes even more than work is a schedule, so help them plan certain times when they have to put down the phone or computer and do something purely for fun. For example, block off time on their calendar for a dinner date or to binge-watch your favorite show.
Aquarius: Too Rational
Being rational definitely isn’t a bad thing, but Aquarians can get to the point where they’re so intellectual that they can’t access their emotions. They may have trouble expressing themselves or not know how to react when you tell them how you’re feeling. You could also find it hard to read them or know what they’re thinking since they can appear aloof. Try to get them to open up slowly. You should also understand that while they may not seem super affectionate, they can show how they feel in other ways, like by teaching you about their interests.
Pisces: Too Idealistic
Pisces are dreamers, which can make them too stuck in their head at times. They can have such an idealistic picture of how they want their relationship to be that the reality might not be able to live up to it, leaving them disappointed. Imagine a Pisces expecting their life to be just like a Disney movie where everything ends happily ever after. Or they may get so caught up dreaming that they never take action. Learn to appreciate how imaginative and creative Pisces are while trying to bring them down to Earth a little bit.