"What do you do when you’re overwhelmed looking at your holiday to-do list or bank account post-gift shopping? What about when you totally forego all your healthy habits, or you struggle with your relationship with food and the holiday meals in front of you can be triggering? Maybe you’re also having a hard time staying present, or getting together with family can cause stress. This is undoubtedly my favorite time of year, but it can also be the most emotionally draining, stressful, and even sad (I mean, even Kacey Musgraves wrote a song about it).
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Consider this your reminder to schedule additional appointments with your therapist or time for self-care, as you’ll likely need a little more TLC. But when you’re in between Friendsgivings, office parties, family and friend get-togethers, or Hallmark movie marathons, read on for a list of affirmations you can repeat to yourself to help you stay present and find a spark of joy even amid any holiday drama. While the affirmations won’t magically erase your worries and anxieties (nor should they imply that negative emotions aren’t valid), they can serve as a friendly nudge to practice more compassionate self-talk this holiday season and beyond.
If you’re celebrating Thanksgiving…
It is the season of giving thanks, after all. What better way to reset your priorities, check in with yourself, and enjoy your loved ones than truly rooting Thanksgiving in gratitude? Avoid going through the motions of who’s going to bring the pumpkin pie or what family rifts will come up, and repeat one of these affirmations to stay focused on the day’s purpose.
1. I’m grateful for another year to make happy memories.
2. I am so in love with my life and everything I have.
3. I invite gratitude into my heart every day.
4. I am grateful I am so loved.
5. My entire body feels warm with gratitude and thankfulness.
If you struggle with your health this time of year…
The holidays are supposed to be a happy time, but they can bring up a lot of stress with your health routine (or lack thereof). Between figuring out gifts for everyone on your list and seemingly endless holiday potluck parties, regular health habits can easily slip through the cracks. Give your mind and body a little extra patience, compassion, and love this year with one of these phrases.
6. I make time for myself every day.
7. My body receives nourishment from joy and pleasure, too.
8. Rest and social time are physically good for me.
9. My mental, emotional, and physical energy are valuable resources to be used however feels best for me.
10. I’m connected with my body, and I love to keep it healthy.
If you feel triggered by family…
Not every family get-together is a magical scene from a holiday movie (in fact, most are not). If being around family or certain friends stirs up certain unwanted emotions, know that you’re not alone. You can (and should) set boundaries to protect your peace and focus on staying as grounded and mindful as possible. These affirmations can help reframe beliefs or fears you may deal with surrounding family.
11. I release memories of my past and stay present.
12. I am worthy of healing.
13. I am proud of the person I am and the life I have.
14. I give myself permission to set boundaries that bring me peace.
15. I can’t control what others say and think, but I can control how I respond and engage with them.
If you’re feeling stressed about money…
While gift-giving, holiday parties, and travel make up some of the best parts of this time of year, they can also add up quickly to make it the most expensive time of year. If you’re feeling stressed about money, try these tips and remember that the most special, memorable, and joyful parts of the season are usually free.
16. Making other people happy makes me happy.
17. It’s OK to be disappointed when things are out of my budget.
18. The most memorable gifts I can give don’t cost a penny.
19. I spend and save money based on what brings me joy.
20. I give myself permission to accept and honor where I am in my financial state right now.
If you’re exhausted from a busy schedule…
If there’s a given about the holidays, it’s this: They’re exhausting. From gatherings to travel to tying up loose ends at work, it can feel like you can’t come up for air from November until January. Instead of letting this season become another frazzled blur, rethink the events, tasks, and people you are spending your time on (and ask yourself if they’re actually worth your time—every “yes” is a “no” to something else), make me-time a non-negotiable, and be mindful so you can fully enjoy it all.
21. My plate is full of things and people I am lucky to have.
22. I am grateful for the abundance of the season.
23. I deserve “me” time.
24. I say “no” when I mean no and “yes” when an event or task brings me joy.
25. Only I am in control of my life.
If you feel lonely this time of year…
Whether you’re spending the holidays solo (Kevin McCallister style) or you have a social calendar packed to the brim with holiday parties, the season can still feel especially lonely. The holidays might remind you that you’re not with certain loved ones right now or be synonymous with being inundated with questions from nosy aunts (When are you getting married/having children/settling down?!). Reframe your thoughts and practice self-compassion to prevent loneliness from getting you down this year.
26. I am whole as I am.
27. I feel joy in where I am in my life.
28. My life is full of people who love me.
29. I am connected to all the love in the world.
30. I can make space for loneliness and practice being kind to myself.
If you’re always let down by the holidays…
Does anyone else deal with holiday perfectionism? We make long to-do lists of all the things we want to do every year and have plans for how we want to make the most of the season, forgetting that we never have enough time for it all—leading to feelings of burnout, disappointment, and sadness. If you are expecting this season to be “perfect,” you tend to overcommit, or you are let down if plans don’t go “as they should,” these affirmations are for you.
31. When things don’t go as planned, I will adjust my expectations.
32. I am present and in the moment.
33. This season is going to be filled with joy, no matter what I do.
34. My happiness is more important than to-do lists or schedules.
35. The only purpose of this season is to enjoy it.
If you struggle with your relationship with food…
Along with the supposed cheer, holidays come with food—and lots and lots of it. For those who struggle with disordered eating, are in recovery, or have a negative relationship with food, holiday events that revolve around a buffet table can especially bring about food or body image-related stressors. Along with the actual physical presence of food, it seems to inevitably be a topic of conversation. Whether it’s unsolicited comments or advice (“I’m going to have to run this all off tomorrow!”), inquisitive-but-mean-well relatives, or just the sight of the Thanksgiving spread, these statements can help with the anxiety, fear, or shame that may arise.
36. I listen to my body’s cues for what I need.
37. My worth and value are not determined by what the scale or mirror displays.
38. (All) food is a nourishing pleasure that’s good for my body.
39. My body deserves nourishment, respect, and care.
40. Nobody has the right to make me feel bad for eating what I want.
Perhaps you’ve experienced the loss of a loved one, pet, job, or relationship. Or maybe you’ve had to come to terms with the fact that your life isn’t what you thought it would be or you’re not where you “should” be. Whatever the circumstance, the holidays tend to dredge up grief, heartache, and disappointment. Whether you’re mourning someone or something, use these affirmations to help you cope and work through the grief.
41. I allow myself to fully grieve and feel all emotions.
42. It’s OK for me to feel both sadness and moments of joy.
43. I am allowed to grieve without having to find a silver lining.
44. I am choosing to be fully present in my life by honoring my loss as it comes up.
45. I am worthy of love, compassion, and support as I grieve.
Josie Santi, Senior Wellness Editor & Podcast Host
Josie has been an editor and writer for The Everygirl since 2017 and became a certified Holistic Health Coach in 2020. As the Senior Wellness Editor, she oversees, writes, and edits wellness content. Listen to Josie on The Everygirl Podcast, where she interviews guests and hosts episodes on a variety of educational, inspirational, and entertaining topics.