"When you consider the toe-curling sensations of an orgasm and the mental and physical benefits that we experience from masturbation, it’s pretty obvious why we look forward to our solo time. But after so many years of reaping the benefits and learning what your body likes and what it takes to get off, it’s easy for masturbation to become an exacting routine. The familiarity is great on the one hand, but just like sex with a partner can get boring when it’s the same thing over and over, solo sex can start to feel monotonous, too. If you’re stuck in the cycle of same place, same toy, same porn, or any other repetition with your masturbation habits, fear not. We spoke to a certified sex therapist to learn how to spice up masturbation so your solo sex life feels fun, fresh, and fulfilling. Ahead, their expert tips, plus some of our personal favorite tricks as well.
Dr. Jennifer Litner, PhD, LMFT
Dr. Jennifer Litner is an AASECT Certified sex therapist, relationship expert for the dating app Flirtini, and a human sexuality educator. She helps people who want a more vibrant sex life to speak openly, deepen their connection, and love energetically.
1. Change your location
It’s pretty common to fall into a pattern when it comes to masturbation, but one of the easiest ways to spice up masturbation is to post up in a different place than usual. Different surroundings can add an element of excitement, especially the more daring they are—say, a backyard if your space is private and you find a thrill in exhibitionism. If you typically gravitate toward your bed and are looking for a less bold switch in location, consider getting comfortable on the couch instead. You could even opt for solo play in the shower for a different location and the added element of water.
2. Switch up your position
A step above a new location is a new position. If you typically get comfortable on your back, consider getting into a different position and exploring the sensations that come with it—the air hitting unexpected places, the new angles of your pleasure points, the delightfully unfamiliar positioning of your toy(s) or fingers. “The new position will make you feel your body in a new way, engage different muscles, and awaken unusual sensitive spots,” says Dr. Litner. So try getting on all fours, kneeling, lying on your stomach, standing against a wall, or sitting on the edge of a table. We typically switch positions during partnered sex, so why not do the same during solo play?
3. Explore erogenous zones
If you’re someone who typically masturbates solely with the goal of climaxing, try slowing down and exploring your erogenous zones. Using your hands or a sex toy, glide over your inner thighs, abdomen, breasts, and any other area that feels sexually stimulating. Adding this layer of foreplay to your routine will heighten your arousal that much more, which can lead to a more powerful orgasm.
4. Use temperature to tease
Playing with hot and cold sensations during masturbation can seriously heighten arousal, and it’s incredibly easy to incorporate. Dr. Litner recommends running either an ice cube or a warm washcloth along your inner thighs, neck, or lower belly to start. “These areas are concentrated with nerve endings and react most acutely as the contrast in temperature awakens sensitivity,” she explains. Your skin will become more receptive to even the lightest touches, making the entire experience and eventual release feel more pleasurable.
5. Experiment with edging
It can be tempting to get straight to the point of release when you’re settled into your usual spot with your standby toy (or your hand), but edging is a great way to slow down, increase the intensity of your orgasms, and relish the overall masturbation experience. Edging is the practice of denying yourself an orgasm to make your climax that much more powerful once you actually allow yourself to come. Try it just once or go through multiple rounds of edging—it’s up to you. Typically, the more you withhold your orgasm, the more intense it will be when you finally let yourself release.
6. Don’t hold back the sounds
According to Dr. Litner, making noise a deliberate part of the process can be unexpectedly arousing, so don’t hold back. Whisper something to yourself, moan out loud, or play with your voice, trying different tones and volumes. “Moans and voices are as much a way to express pleasure as touching… Your body relaxes and your climax may become more intense when you let yourself sound off freely,” she explains. If you live with roommates or family, or you just don’t want your neighbors to hear you through thin apartment walls, try whispering ASMR style or quietly reading your favorite erotica out loud to yourself.
7. Consume a new type of porn
Consuming porn is a great way to get in the mood and fantasize while masturbating. If you don’t typically browse porn during solo play, consider exploring a few videos the next time you start feeling frisky, especially if you’re a visual person. If you are someone who likes a little solo time with a spicy book, try listening to erotic stories or specifically reading erotica. Watching, listening to, or reading a different type of porn is a simple switch that can keep your masturbation routine exciting. You never know what will turn you on, so even if you try something new and don’t love it, there are so many other porn formats to try next time you settle in to masturbate.
8. Try guided masturbation
If you find yourself rushing through masturbation just to reach the point of climax, incorporating guided masturbation into your routine can encourage you to luxuriate in the experience. The practice usually involves listening to verbal instruction via audio prompts that guide you through touching yourself for a more mindful, meditative experience. Thanks to the instruction, you’ll likely try new techniques like edging and incorporate other erogenous zones, which can be a total game-changer. Plus, this slower, more intentional way of masturbating can help you explore your sexual pleasure in a safe space.
9. Use a new toy
Sex toys can upgrade sexual stimulation of any kind. Just like switching up the location where you usually masturbate, swapping your usual sex toy for a different device or two is an easy way to spice up your routine. You could even simply add another toy to the mix in addition to your reliable standby. If you typically use a clitoral vibrator, consider adding a dildo or anal plug, depending on how adventurous you’re feeling.
10. Watch yourself in a mirror
According to Dr. Litner, watching yourself in a mirror while you masturbate can deepen your mind-body connection and ultimately, boost pleasure. Use a full-length mirror so you can see your entire body—your face, curves, and sensitive areas—and watch your reactions as you touch yourself. You can even use a hand-held mirror so you can get an even more intimate look at how certain angles elicit pleasure for you. Not only is this incredibly hot, but it can help you feel more self-confident, empowered, and sexually liberated. Try different angles and watch how different parts of your body react to toys and touch, so you can learn exactly what makes you orgasm.
Alyssa Davis, Contributing Home Writer
Alyssa Davis is a freelance writer specializing in home, lifestyle, beauty, and entertainment content. She studied English at Indiana University and has since produced articles for publications including SheKnows, Architectural Digest, and Well+Good, to name a few.