"Oral sex may seem self-explanatory, and for the most part, I suppose it is. While it can be great as foreplay or as the standalone event of an evening (or any time of day, let’s be real), it may seem like there’s not much to say beyond the typical mouth-to-genital stimulation we know all too well. A lot of us (myself included) exist somewhere in the dichotomy between either loving oral stimulation or not quite getting the hype. In fact, I’ve heard countless reports from folks who consider giving and receiving head to be, quite frankly, boring after a while. But would you believe me if I said it didn’t have to be that way with the help of the right oral sex tips?
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Multiple steamy AF oral sex tips can help elevate it and keep it from falling flat in the moment. Whether you consider yourself a pro or would like to shake up the same-old-same-old, learning new oral sex tips, techniques, and options will always prove to be beneficial. Ahead, we’re getting into five ways that you and a partner can try to elevate your oral game next time you’re in the mood.
1. Change up your position
Sex positions aren’t just for penetration. Mixing up something as simple as how your bodies are oriented in space may be the ticket to a little extra spice in your oral game. You’ve likely heard of or experienced the classic positions. For example, if the partner receiving has a vagina, a go-to tends to have them lying on their back with legs spread, which I affectionately call the missionary of oral sex. Another classic option is hovering over or sitting on the giver’s face. If the receiving partner has a penis, it’s most typical to see them standing while the giver kneels in front of them or lying on their back similarly to missionary.
Things often become standard for a reason. In this case, that reason is because they work, but it can be fun to experiment with different positions. By doing this, you can enhance and change the sensations, angles, and visuals you typically experience when going down on your partner. If this interests you but you don’t know where to start, have no fear. Check out these examples of oral sex positions to try! But remember, the best position is the one that feels good to you and your partner, so don’t be afraid to experiment.
2. Add sex toys
I will shout the praises of sex toys every chance I get, and oral sex is no different. Getting a little toy action involved during head is a wonderful way to shake up the pace and play with an entirely new sensory element. On partners with a vagina, toys can be used for clitoral, vaginal, and nipple stimulation to enhance and complement what’s already happening with the tongue and fingers. On partners with a penis, using a typical vibrator can take a bit more creativity (but can still up the pleasure game)! While they make toys specifically for penises, simply placing a vibrator at the base of the shaft can add an intense sensation to enhance the licking, sucking, or bobbing motions you’ve already got going on.
Asking your partner to use a toy on you while you go down on them can make the experience even more pleasurable for both parties. They get to watch you feel good while you make them feel good. It’s truly a winning situation all around! If you have a favorite sex toy in your rotation already, try it out. Or, use it as an excuse to try a new one. Trust me when I say that you can never have too many.
3. Make some noise
I don’t just mean moans of pleasure or words of affirmation for your partner—though you should totally let them know what is and isn’t working for you! I’m talking about humming. I’m talking about whispers. Making noise during oral stimulation can mimic the vibrations of a toy, but feels—dare I say—hotter? Audible exclamations of enjoyment from both partners can deepen your connection and remind you that your partner enjoys making you feel good.
When I can tell that my partner is into what he’s doing, it helps me relax and give in to the pleasurable sensations instead of getting too deep in my head. It also feels damn amazing. Another tip is to ask your partner to tell you when they’re approaching climax and hum or moan through it with them. It will heighten their pleasure and encourage them to reach that oh-so-good peak… and it will likely turn you on more, too.
4. Play with temperature and texture
Heat up your oral sex by cooling things down a bit! Drinking some ice water or holding an ice cube in your mouth immediately before going down on your partner will produce a tingling sensation in a thrilling and amazing way. You can even experiment with warm water for the opposite effect. (This is a great way to begin exploring kink if that’s something you’re interested in!) I’ve often heard of people using honey and whipped cream to play with texture and flavor; however, I recommend always going for a flavored lube instead. Food products can mess with PH balances—burning and itching sensations are no fun. Flavored lube can provide that sticky, slippery sensation without any concern of infection later! I’m all for oral sex tips that maximum pleasure and thrill with maximum safety.
5. Be a tease
Start slow and really savor the experience. Teasing can be deeply intimate, and IMO there is nothing sexier than anticipation. Starting with their neck, work your way down to their chest, stomach, and thighs (or any erogenous zone) in slow motion. Kiss, lick, and suck everywhere except exactly where they want you to. Use your fingers and toys (whatever works for you and your partner) to deliberately bring your partner to the brink of desire. This will heighten the pleasurable sensations once you finally make contact with the penis or the clitoris.
Breath is also an amazing tool when it comes to teasing. Allowing your kisses and warm breath to sustain the sense of anticipation around your partner’s most sensitive areas will drive them crazy in the best way. You may also want to work edging into your oral routine to make that eventual release 10x more euphoric.
Sydney Cox, Contributing Sex & Relationships Writer
Sydney Cox is a Chicago-based writer and intimacy coordinator who is passionate about exploring the complexities of human connections and teaching readers to advocate for themselves. Sydney’s work has been featured in various publications, where they aim to foster open and honest conversations.