It was 2021. The glow of my laptop screen lit up my face as I typed in my credit card information. My hands trembled slightly while thoughts raced through my mind: What if people think I’m weird? Wouldn’t this be better with someone else? I hovered over the “Complete Transaction” button, and with one tap, I did something that would’ve felt impossible just months earlier—I bought myself a ticket to a concert I planned to attend alone.
What was once considered taboo is now a celebrated form of self-care—regardless of your relationship status. Before doing things alone became normalized, many of us shied away from solo experiences altogether, even if that meant forgoing an experience we truly wanted. Being seen alone used to suggest that something was “wrong” with you or that you were a loner. But now, that narrative has shifted. Solo dates are no longer a sign of loneliness—they’re a way to deepen the relationship we have with ourselves.
This is what inspired me to start taking myself out on solo dates. I decided to spend the same (if not more) time and energy dating myself as I did dating potential partners. Initially, my goal was to get comfortable being alone, but over time, my intention evolved into building a relationship with myself rooted in trust, peace, and authenticity. That’s when I began intentionally planning four different types of dates, with each one designed to help me connect and get to know myself in unique ways. From creative dates that sparked my imagination to indulgent ones that reminded me that I deserve to celebrate myself, every experience taught me something new about who I am.
Ahead, I’m sharing more on each of these types of solo dates, including what they are, why everyone should try them, and how each one can help you strengthen the most important relationship you’ll ever have: the one you have with yourself.
1. Creative Solo Dates
Creative solo dates are opportunities for us to tap into our imagination and explore our curiosity. I gravitate toward planning a creative solo date for myself when I feel the itch to try something new or need to get out of a rut, and I always leave them feeling inspired and energized. Through creative solo dates, I learned that my imagination is limitless, and if I take the time to invite playfulness into my routines, my creativity will always show up. It is one of my favorite ways I’ve learned to express myself freely.
Creative solo date ideas
- Take yourself to a pottery, painting, or ceramics class
- Try a new journaling style
- Try a new recipe you’ve been saving (and set the table for yourself!)
- Visit a local museum or art gallery and let yourself wander
- Rearrange spaces in your home to welcome fresh energy
- Try a DIY project (think: painting a thrifted item or scrapbooking a memory book)
“Solo dates are no longer a sign of loneliness—they’re a way to deepen the relationship we have with ourselves.”
2. Grounding Solo Dates
I first started planning grounding solo dates when I realized how often I picked up my phone or filled my schedule the moment I felt restless, instead of giving myself the stillness I needed. They’ve since become one of my favorite ways to quiet the noise and reconnect with myself. When I notice that I’m going through my days on autopilot or that I’m more tired than usual, I know it’s time to schedule another.
My go-to grounding dates include cozy yoga, meditation sessions with incense and calm music or long walks with my phone on Do Not Disturb around town. After these dates, I always leave feeling more in tune with myself, which helps me make decisions and take action that align with my best self.
Grounding solo date ideas
- Take a long morning or sunset walk without your phone
- Have a slow, mindful breakfast while journaling or listening to soft music
- Spend an afternoon reading a cozy book by a window or at a local cafe with no agenda
- Cook yourself a comforting meal from scratch, focusing on each step of the process
- Visit a nearby park or garden to spend quiet time in nature
3. Indulgent Solo Dates
Indulgent solo dates are for The Everygirls who love their spa days and bubble baths. I believe that indulgent solo dates deserve a place in everyone’s calendar because they remind us that we deserve to be pampered and treated.
When I was single, it was easy to abandon these little luxuries (e.g., making reservations at a restaurant I’ve been eyeing, buying myself flowers, or splurging on a new outfit) because I convinced myself that I had to wait for special occasions or until someone decided that I deserved them. But learning to treat myself “just because” helped me see that I don’t need an external reason or someone by my side to feel deserving of attention and celebration.
“Although a partner can absolutely buy you flowers or plan a romantic dinner, treating yourself reminds you that love starts with how you show up for yourself.”
Now that I’m in a relationship, I still make it a point to plan indulgent solo dates because they reaffirm that I’m responsible for my own happiness. Think about it: Although a partner can absolutely buy you flowers or plan a romantic dinner, treating yourself reminds you that love starts with how you show up for yourself.
Indulgent solo date ideas
- Treat yourself to a massage, facial, or spa day
- Dine at a high-end restaurant
- Have a bath night complete with candles, bath bombs, music, and your favorite drink
- Take yourself shopping and buy one thing that makes you feel confident
- Splurge on something small but meaningful, like flowers, chocolate, or a new book
4. Adventurous Solo Dates
My first official adventurous solo date was a concert. It was a conscious decision because I was determined to overcome my fear of doing things alone. Little did I know that that experience would be the gateway to my love for adventurous me-time. Since then, I’ve taken solo trips, enrolled in classes by myself, and gone on hiking ventures alone.
Adventurous solo dates can be anything from planning a staycation to going to the movie theater alone. These are the types of dates many of us avoid doing solo because they feel intimidating, so we cross our fingers and hope that someone, somewhere, will eventually do these things with us. But that’s exactly what makes them so transformative. When we step out of our comfort zones and face our fears, we grow and learn more about ourselves. The nerves I initially feel anytime I do something adventurous turn into a sense of pride afterward, reminding me of how capable and independent I really am.
Since adventurous dates can be more expensive or require more planning, I don’t do them as often as the other types (once every few months is my norm). Because of that, I treat them as milestones and see them as opportunities to stretch myself and to prove that I can create adventure and joy on my own terms.
Adventurous solo date ideas
- Go to a concert, festival, or movie
- Try a new glass that pushes you out of your comfort zone, like boxing, improv, or rock climbing
- Plan a staycation and explore your city like a tourist
- Book a ticket to a place you’ve always wanted to visit
Aaliyah Alexander, Contributing Writer
Aaliyah is a writer, content creator, and blogger based in Brandon, Mississippi. She attended San Diego State University where she received a degree in journalism and worked as an editor for the award-winning student newspaper, The Daily Aztec. Aaliyah covers a range of topics including slow living, her favorite vegan food spots, minimalism, self-growth, and entertainment.
